And another...

Ok. I think this one might actually be even funnier...

So my best friend called this morning, I assumed to tell me more about the creditors calling for Scumbag. But no, not today. Today she called to tell me that her Boyfriend got mugged on the way home. LAST WEEK!!! See, the poor girl lives in the ghetto (not by choice of course) and right now they're paving her street so she has to park a mile away and sprint to her front door, lock herself in, and wait until morning. Thankfully she usually gets home before dark but alas, Boyfriend got home late from work one night and was subsequently mugged by three fine, upstanding young men who managed to steal a whopping $7 from him. Now, he also had a laptop on him and since he didn't want the muggers to take it, he did what every other red blooded young man would do in this situation. He screamed bloody murder. Thankfully, due to the night time paving job, there was a cop nearby who managed to arrest Boyfriend's attackers.
While crying uncontrollably, my best friend asks him why he didn't tell her about this earlier and he points out that he knew it would upset her. She continues to wail, spewing "what if's" and pointing out the obvious that these guys could have killed him. Boyfriend simply shrugs and replies, "Hey it was my first mugging. I think it went well!"